Hold Me Fast Through Sleepless Nights


A friend of mine advised me to sing hymns to help me through labour with my first child. She said they helped her stay calm through the contractions. Honestly, hymns were the last thing on my mind that day in the hospital, but I would remember this advice a few weeks later in a different part of motherhood.

I paced the floor between our closet and the bed, patting the small, wailing baby on my chest. I had walked this path so many times that doing it in the dark was no challenge—around the bed, by the desk corner, in the closet, turn at the mirror, and back. Sometimes, I’d watch the clock go past the hour mark before laying in bed again. One night, after doing this for the second time, tears rolled down my cheeks. How will I survive? I feel like I’m going crazy. All I wanted was sleep, but my sweet baby was wide awake peering around the dark room. As panic rose in my chest, I knew I needed to relax in order to keep my baby calm. 

It was then I remembered my friend’s advice about hymns. 

We sing hymns each Sunday, but as I racked my tired brain in search of one I could sing, or even hum, I drew a blank. Oh, what’s that one I really like that we used to sing… He Will Hold Me Fast.

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