His Love Depends Not On Me

His Love Depends Not On Me

I had to carry my doubts to the foot of the cross. I needed to remember the sufficient and complete work of Christ that merited God’s forgiveness and love towards me. I needed to remember that forgiveness of my sins was a gift of grace, and continued to be a gift of grace, so that, “if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved” (Romans 10:9-10 ESV). I needed to remember the old, old story of the cross.

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When Your Identity Feels Hidden in Motherhood

When Your Identity Feels Hidden in Motherhood

 Rachel found her identity in something we still do today: Motherhood. Whether we are mothers already or desiring to be mothers, we too at times find fulfillment and joy in becoming moms. We place our hope in being the best mom and strive to outdo one another in mothering (just look at the mommy wars on social media). Or perhaps while waiting to be married, we watch the mothers around us and wish we could find a husband so we could fill our arms with a baby too. Or maybe we are married but God has shut our womb. 

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Behind Closed Doors: Fear and Food

Behind Closed Doors: Fear and Food

God, why can’t I be free from this, even still? I prayed. What kind of believer, what kind of counselor, what kind of mother am I if I can’t catch a grip on this single struggle even now? Yet, in the midst of this fear, God has taught me that He is still faithful to us even when we have yet to conquer our greatest fears.

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It is Well With My Soul—Even Though I Am Not in Control

It is Well With My Soul—Even Though I Am Not in Control

I was weary that night. I expected joy and excitement as I prepared for my newborn. I longed for those sweet kicks and a rounded belly. But when I finally got it, it wasn’t at all what I had hoped for—instead of excitement, I had the miseries of anxiety. My pregnancy seemed to be filled with hospital trips for unknown bleeding, random cramping, unbelievable backaches, and all the worries that accompany those. 

I believed that when Levi finally came, my worries dissipate. Finally freed from my fragile womb, and I could know if and when something was wrong. I could finally have some kind of knowledge and control over this little life. 

But that wasn’t the case. 

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Grace for the Pregnant Housewife

Grace for the Pregnant Housewife

Though my husband never seemed bothered, I cried and apologized daily for the messy floors and my excess sleep. I knew I needed rest, but the amount I was getting overwhelmed me. I wanted to force myself into my old routines, but my body wouldn’t allow it. My husband would try to pick up the slack, but that only made me more sad and frustrated.  

Tired and exhausted momma, can you relate to what I experienced? First time pregnant wife, do you know the struggle of perfectionism and tiredness? It doesn’t need to stay this way. I want to offer you true change and hope from the Bible that I had to work through in those early months of pregnancy as a housewife.

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The Right Kind of Hope

The Right Kind of Hope

We want hope that will help us persevere in the suffering that will inevitably come. But for our hope to do this, it needs to be set on something. Hope doesn’t come alone—though hope may seem like an ambiguous concept, it needs to be placed on something sure if we are to persevere. Friend, which kind of hope do you have? Is your hope sure, or does it only lead to more pain and anxiety?

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When You Don’t Love Motherhood—Love Your Sustainer 

When You Don’t Love Motherhood—Love Your Sustainer 

What we don’t think about is the possibility that we may not always enjoy motherhood. That motherhood isn’t all bliss and sloppy kisses. Or how we will cope when the postpartum depression kicks in. Or how we will survive those endless days trapped in our home breastfeeding a baby going through a growth spurt. Or how we will make it through the colic. I experience days like this, and I know the only thing sustaining me is the grace of God. If motherhood has taught me anything, it is that God will hold me fast. 

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When You Feel Like a Less-Than Mother

When You Feel Like a Less-Than Mother

Momma, are you afraid that you don’t have it “together enough” to be a mom? Do you already feel like a failure when you see the put-together moms around you? Do you look at their perfectly still children sitting in the pews and feel like giving up? Aside from my fears of throwing up, I have many other reasons to feel like a failure compared to my fellow mom friends. But God is giving me a new hope in him, and teaching me to stop looking around at others and start looking at him.

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When the Memories of Sin Remains

When the Memories of Sin Remains

It takes us by surprise—the cringe-worthy memory of a past sin we wish we could forget. Maybe you were picking out clothing to wear the next day, packing a lunch, doing housework, watching TV, or playing with your children. One thought quickly connected to another, and suddenly a horrible memory was resurfaced. The pain, the regret, the shame, and disgusting feelings all returned as if you had just committed the sin again. The memories are so vivid you could shutter. Each of us will battle the memories of sin. Not one person can say they have no memory of sins they have committed. So what do we do with these memories that make us cringe? How do we face the memories in Christ?

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Lessons on Sanctification While Living in A Construction Zone

Lessons on Sanctification While Living in A Construction Zone

A year of living in on-going house renovations, seeing rooms completed one piece at a time, I have learned not only patience but a lot about sanctification. In many ways this little house is much like my heart, and yours too. 

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No Longer Waiting: Hope for When the Battle Continues to Rage

No Longer Waiting: Hope for When the Battle Continues to Rage

I used to imagine the day I would be free from anxiety. I pictured myself encouraging others who battled by saying that they too, someday, could find healing and peace. I imagined writing a book about how I overcame anxiety and others could too. I pictured that triumphant day, swinging my legs over the side of my bed, and smiling into the new day, anxiety-free. Instead, I sit on my bed, twenty-one years old, still waging war with anxiety.

And yet, I know this is a story of hope.

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Submit Your Dream to God

Submit Your Dream to God

Has life not turned out the way you dreamed? Maybe you thought you would have a growing family with babies and toddlers in tow—but your arms remain empty. Perhaps you saw yourself going out on double dates with your married friends by now—yet you’re the only one who is still single. Maybe you saw yourself with a nicer and better-paying job at this point—but you still push grocery items on a conveyor belt.

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Growing As An Anxious Mother: My Story of Fear and Motherhood

Growing As An Anxious Mother: My Story of Fear and Motherhood

I stared at the no longer blinking pregnancy test. “What does that say?”

My husband jumped up from the floor and opened his arms to embrace me. “You’re pregnant, babe! We’re going to have a baby!”

He wrapped me in his arms, and immediately my heart and mind both began racing. How can it be? How did it happen so easily? How am I pregnant so quickly? And then, the inevitable thought, What if I miscarry?

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