I struggled to find what I deemed to be adequate time in scripture with the tumbling of my “perfect” schedule. Meanwhile, I was still trying to figure out this new world of motherhood, breastfeeding and supplementing extra breastmilk through syringes, sneaking in sleep when I could, and throwing meals together in between. Rather than hours spent over God’s word, I curled up in bed at night to read a few chapters while guilt raided my heart. Moms at any stage can easily fall into the lie that says we must study the Bible a certain way, everyday. Though Bible study is essential to the Christian life, we must guard against Bible study legalism.Read More
Rather than continuing to stumble my way through the same prayer each morning, I found a journal and started writing my prayers. At first, it felt awkward, almost forced, but soon it became my new rhythm. Maybe this is a practice you could take up, too. Though it may feel strange at first, doing so might grow you in ways you never expected through diversifying your prayers, focusing your mind, and preaching the truth to your own heart.Read More
The value of something can be proven when it stands the test of time. Like the hymns we sing at church on Sunday, or at home any day of the week. These theological melodies are timeless and are worth our time, attention, and voices still today. For me, the hymn He Will Hold Me Fast has greatly encouraged me and strengthened me through this first year of motherhood.Read More
My ideal of discipleship involved weekly meetings, formal Bible studies, answers to hard questions, and in-depth counseling. But this wasn’t what God provided at the time. Rather, God provided me with something much less intentional, but no less formative—a family who showed us hospitality. You see, discipleship doesn’t only take place in quiet rooms with books, Bibles, and coffee—it also takes place in the bustling homes of our fellow brothers and sisters as well.Read More
Christina Fox’s book Sufficient Hope came to me during one of those waves of floundering and showed me what I truly needed: to be reminded of the gospel. “Whatever experiences we face in motherhood, we all need Jesus—and he is sufficient. That’s what this book is about: our need for the gospel of Jesus Christ. In every moment, in every season, and whatever our circumstances, the gospel is sufficient to give us hope” (p. 14).Read More
Rachel found her identity in something we still do today: Motherhood. Whether we are mothers already or desiring to be mothers, we too at times find fulfillment and joy in becoming moms. We place our hope in being the best mom and strive to outdo one another in mothering (just look at the mommy wars on social media). Or perhaps while waiting to be married, we watch the mothers around us and wish we could find a husband so we could fill our arms with a baby too. Or maybe we are married but God has shut our womb.Read More
In her book Idols of a Mother’s Heart, Christina Fox sets out to help mothers recognize the idols they have stored away in the corners of their hearts. But she doesn’t leave us mothers there with a pile of idols to clean up on our own—with the words of a fellow mom who knows the battle all too well herself, Christina guides mothers how to turn from those idols and back to God, without forgetting the gospel hope we desperately need.Read More
In motherhood, there are many things I want control of. I want to control my child’s health and safety. I want to control their future happiness. I want to control their behavior. I want to control their salvation and ensure that they become believers. These are a few of the many things I vainly grapple to control. Notice I said vainly. I can control none of these aspects of my child’s life. And that makes me fearful.Read More
I was weary that night. I expected joy and excitement as I prepared for my newborn. I longed for those sweet kicks and a rounded belly. But when I finally got it, it wasn’t at all what I had hoped for—instead of excitement, I had the miseries of anxiety. My pregnancy seemed to be filled with hospital trips for unknown bleeding, random cramping, unbelievable backaches, and all the worries that accompany those.
I believed that when Levi finally came, my worries dissipate. Finally freed from my fragile womb, and I could know if and when something was wrong. I could finally have some kind of knowledge and control over this little life.
But that wasn’t the case.Read More
Though my husband never seemed bothered, I cried and apologized daily for the messy floors and my excess sleep. I knew I needed rest, but the amount I was getting overwhelmed me. I wanted to force myself into my old routines, but my body wouldn’t allow it. My husband would try to pick up the slack, but that only made me more sad and frustrated.
Tired and exhausted momma, can you relate to what I experienced? First time pregnant wife, do you know the struggle of perfectionism and tiredness? It doesn’t need to stay this way. I want to offer you true change and hope from the Bible that I had to work through in those early months of pregnancy as a housewife.Read More
Frustration coiled in my heart like a snake ready to lunge. It felt like I could never find a moment to myself since Levi was born. I couldn’t help but envy all the people around me who I imagined sitting in their homes, showered and clean with nicely styled hair, who didn’t have this problem. The often repeated words of this culture made the snake in my heart rattled it’s tail: You need more time for yourself—how can you love others if you aren’t loving yourself first? Is this true, even for us Christians? Where does self-care fit in the biblical worldview?Read More
We want hope that will help us persevere in the suffering that will inevitably come. But for our hope to do this, it needs to be set on something. Hope doesn’t come alone—though hope may seem like an ambiguous concept, it needs to be placed on something sure if we are to persevere. Friend, which kind of hope do you have? Is your hope sure, or does it only lead to more pain and anxiety?Read More
What we don’t think about is the possibility that we may not always enjoy motherhood. That motherhood isn’t all bliss and sloppy kisses. Or how we will cope when the postpartum depression kicks in. Or how we will survive those endless days trapped in our home breastfeeding a baby going through a growth spurt. Or how we will make it through the colic. I experience days like this, and I know the only thing sustaining me is the grace of God. If motherhood has taught me anything, it is that God will hold me fast.Read More
Momma, are you afraid that you don’t have it “together enough” to be a mom? Do you already feel like a failure when you see the put-together moms around you? Do you look at their perfectly still children sitting in the pews and feel like giving up? Aside from my fears of throwing up, I have many other reasons to feel like a failure compared to my fellow mom friends. But God is giving me a new hope in him, and teaching me to stop looking around at others and start looking at him.Read More
The sub-title summarizes the book perfectly: “Morning Times, Nursery Rhymes, and My Journey Towards Sanctification.” Motherhood is sanctifying, and Cindy Rollins displays this through stories of laughter, tears, and celebration. Reading this book, I felt as if I were sitting next Cindy on my couch sharing the wonders and woes of motherhood, all the while being encouraged that in Christ it is possible to survive.Read More
Has life not turned out the way you dreamed? Maybe you thought you would have a growing family with babies and toddlers in tow—but your arms remain empty. Perhaps you saw yourself going out on double dates with your married friends by now—yet you’re the only one who is still single. Maybe you saw yourself with a nicer and better-paying job at this point—but you still push grocery items on a conveyor belt.Read More
I stared at the no longer blinking pregnancy test. “What does that say?”
My husband jumped up from the floor and opened his arms to embrace me. “You’re pregnant, babe! We’re going to have a baby!”
He wrapped me in his arms, and immediately my heart and mind both began racing. How can it be? How did it happen so easily? How am I pregnant so quickly? And then, the inevitable thought, What if I miscarry?Read More
I folded the last onesie and placed it in the drawer of our new nursery bureau. For most pregnant women, preparing their nursery for the arrival of their precious baby marks an exciting time. Happy thoughts of rocking their baby to sleep fill their minds, along with sounds of their baby’s sweet coos as they snuggle in the crib.
But my first thought was not so sweet. Instead, it was bitter: What if my unborn baby dies?
My fellow mom-to-be, do you struggle with fears of losing your baby? I do too.Read More