Does sanctification ever feel too slow for you? Haven’t I gone to war with enough sins? Haven’t I reached a decent level of holiness? Shouldn’t I be immune to the devil’s temptations now? Sanctification may be slow, but God remains steadfast.

I can spend days mulling over thoughts and concerns in my head or one day blurt them out in a text to a friend, but how often do I bring these petitions to my Heavenly Father? In suffering, my prayer life can become wobbly. Why? Here are just a handful of reasons why prayer is hard during suffering and how God’s grace covers us even in those weak hours.

About 15-25% of recognized pregnancies will end in a miscarriage. If you don’t already know someone who has miscarried, chances are you will meet someone. To those who have not experienced a miscarriage, you can feel helpless watching those you love experience one. How do we help? How do we encourage them in this unique pain?

We’re all going to face suffering in this life—it’s sadly inevitable. Yet, what is also inevitable are the lies. In the midst of suffering, we can set our minds on truth, what the Bible actually says about our pain. Here are five misconceptions about suffering and the truth to which we can cling.

Burdened brothers and sisters, we can’t sanctify ourselves. Along with the apostle Paul, I gently ask you (and myself): having begun by the Spirit, do we believe we’re now being perfected by our own strength (Gal. 3:3). While it is good to pursue holiness, at the end of the day we must know that it is the Spirit—not our plans, works, obedience, or Bible memorization—who sanctifies us.

Theology is easier to articulate in articles, books, and journals than it is lived out. It’s one thing to claim that God is sovereign, and it’s another to see him take away and find a way to praise his name. Learning theology comes in two parts. There’s the time in the classroom (or on the couch with a good book) and there’s the time of living it out.

Discernment is like examining a well-done counterfeit painting—we need an expert, well-trained eye to see the tiny detail differences between the genuine and the fake. But how is this eye for detail trained? How do we strengthen our discernment muscles?

As natural as our feelings are, they don’t always communicate what is true. Our feelings often fall short of reality, though they can easily convince us of a different perception. But as believers, we are called to live by and think on what is true—not what feels true—and the truth of God’s Word must always prevail over our feelings.

When we think of ways to grow in our love for God and our neighbours, we often think of public or visible acts of service in which we give our time and resources: volunteering in church, donating money and clothes, babysitting for a tired mom, cooking a meal for a mourning family, and the like. But have we ever considered that loving God and loving our neighbours well means that we must know God’s Word well?

Maybe you have felt that too, that grasping in the air for faith while your hope is depleted. If your faith is weak and you’re stumbling through a barren land in search of something to strengthen you, there is one who loves you, who supplies your every ounce of faith, even when you feel faithless.

When we spend too much time in our own heads, thinking about all that’s wrong and going wrong, our worlds magnify themselves beyond their true size. While it’s valid to mourn and to acknowledge these difficulties, I’m seeing that sometimes what we really need is to take a step back and see how big creation is.

How do we study the Bible as sleep-deprived, weary moms? Mothers at any stage can easily fall into the lie that says we must study the Bible a certain way, everyday. Though Bible study is essential to the Christian life, we must guard against Bible study legalism.

Rather than continuing to stumble my way through the same prayer each morning, I found a journal and started writing my prayers. Writing our prayers can diversifying our requests and praise, focus our minds, and preach the truths to our hearts.

“If only I had [fill in the blank], then I could obey God better”? If only I had more time, friends who were more present, family members who weren’t so trying, a pet that wasn’t so needy, improved health, or the like roll through our minds. We forget that sin permeates all of our lives, not just where we’re lacking.

This is when I picked up Glenna’s book, The Promise is His Presence. In her book, Glenna took me by the hand and led me through her story of suffering, waiting, and unanswered prayers alongside the redemption narrative of Scripture from Genesis to Revelation.

We know the call of Titus 2—to teach the younger women “to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, [and] kind.” But how do we do that? How do we do this in a caring way? How do we become mentors like the ones who have discipled us?

As those who have been redeemed by the gospel, we should have heavenly thoughts. But how do we do this? How do we take those thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ? By installing Philippians 4:8 as a guard over our minds.

My ideal of discipleship involved weekly meetings, formal Bible studies, answers to hard questions, and in-depth counseling. But this wasn’t what God provided at the time. Rather, God provided me with something much less intentional, but no less formative—a family who showed us hospitality.

Though we may rightly lament the pain our earthly fathers caused (and seek help if we are in an abusive situation), we can also find hope in our sonship with our Heavenly Father. Though our earthly dads fathered us in sin, he fathers us in perfection and righteousness. We are not fatherless.

Christina Fox’s book Sufficient Hope came to me during one of those waves of floundering and showed me what I truly needed: to be reminded of the gospel. “Whatever experiences we face in motherhood, we all need Jesus—and he is sufficient.” (p. 14).